Dating my Daughter

What internal serpent
Has lent you his forked tongue?
From what pit of foul deceit
Are all these whoppers sprung?

These words, although from a poem written over 200 years ago, are bang on target in today’s dating minefield. According to figures from the Office for National Statistics there are approximately 1.3 million single people in London between the ages of 25 and 39. That’s a pretty big sea with plenty of fish in it! And yet despite all the My-Face-Twittering, personal ads and numerous online dating sites, love isn’t happening for many. Perhaps the sea is too vast which is why all the singletons try to step up their game to be noticed. (Without sounding like a loser, freak or psycho/sociopath).
The trouble with internet dating is that it creates liars of hitherto straight talking individuals. From the profiles to the photographs their declarations range from truth-bending to mind-bending. A sort of “CV speak” for the soul which needs to be read with a generous teaspoon of salt.
For instance:
-Caring…….The word “caring” is everywhere. Men describing themselves as caring, women saying that they want a caring man. In the real world this translates as follows:-
She: Do you care about the effects of climate change on the Polar regions?
He: Yes
She: Do you care if the hand towels co-ordinate with the soap in the bathroom?
He: No

Good Sense Of Humour …….
Man slips on ice and falls face first into the lap of a nun. (Might cause a chuckle)
Man slips on ice and fractures his pelvis. (? funny).
In the real world men like women who laugh at their jokes and women like men who make them laugh. There is no G with the SOH.

….. love dining out….. An all you can eat buffet for a fiver is hardly a gourmet experience.

…..enjoy cosy nights in…. Rubbish! You only stay home when you have to i.e. you’re broke, hungover or recovering from the flu.

…… love long walks? …Yeah….because you’ve got no car!

When mamas (and papas) get together to talk about our children we don’t need to lie. We know them so well we can reel off the good attributes as well as the reasons why they’re single. (Honesty is always the best policy).

Maybe it’s time to lend Cupid a helping hand!